Running and Thinking...a Dangerous Combination!

As our runs have gotten progressively longer, and my pace has quickened considerably, I feel great about where my running is and where it's going.  That being said, I think all desire to run a marathon has left me.  How did this happen?  What is going on in this head of mine?  I think it's life.  I mean, honestly, I want one.  And by that, I mean a life that includes running but is not so completely and totally obsessed with pace, plans, miles, or anything else that goes into prepping for a big race.  I find going a little crazy more and more as hubby and I pore over trail maps or Map my Run, desperately trying to piece together enough miles to fit our scheduled run according to "the plan."  I am sick of the plan.  I JUST WANNA RUN!  Why is that so bad?  Why does there always have to be another level to push to, something else to work toward.  Why?  I ask myself a lot of these questions while I'm out on my own running for hours on end and I don't know the answers.  I know that two hours is a long time to be alone with my own thoughts.  I need some type of conversation.  Luckily, hubby loops back when he runs with me (he's about 2 minutes/mile faster than I am) and I at least get the check-in, "Hey, honey, how you doing?" And I love it.  I need it.  Really, I think him and I are at the point where we really are most comfortable with 2-3 hours max of running at a time. 
So, where does this leave my marathon plan on April 28?  Honestly, I don't know.  I know I can do it, so I might just do it, but there's a part of me that really is thinking of changing my plan that day to the same event hubby's doing...the Triple Crown.  It's 3 races in succession...a half marathon, a 10k and a 5k.  But there's more time in between for talking and just enjoying the day.  My alternative?  5 hours of me, myself and I trudging in the woods.  Not sure that's something I'm looking forward to at this point.  Last weekend's half-marathon in the woods, while beautiful, was a lonely, lonely run.  I was alone for at least 10 miles of it, and I felt alone. 
So, now that I've whined through half of a blog post... some good stuff!  I was so excited today that my boy joined me for the first two miles of my run!  I was so excited.  He's only run with me once, my first 5k when the hubby got sick and it was a partner race, the boy stepped in and did it with me.  I think he just wanted to buy some running shoes because he has a problem when it comes to buying shoes, but whatever the reason, I was in heaven!   We even made a stop at my sister's new house and I love that she is living close enough for me to run by every now and then.  Life really is good.  I know it.  Even if I am sick to death of the running plan, and I think the hubby is getting there too...we've been out biking this week and even skipped a run to do it.  What?!?  I just want to not feel guilty if we take a night off to walk the dogs, or take a bike ride or even do some hiking. 

So, this is my official notice to "the plan" - from here on out I am not listening to you!  You will be more of a "guideline" and as long as my butt is doing something, I am not going to stress over what I am supposed to be doing!  3 months of you telling me what to do is long enough.  I love to run, and you're not ruining it for me.  Do I sound convincing?